TRANSCRIPT OF AUDIO FILE:

BEGIN TRANSCRIPT:

CLIENT: I’m here!

THERAPIST: You’re here! Yeah, and you said you’re not going to do the... you’re not going to do the surgery until the summer, right?

CLIENT: Yeah. (pause) And then, there was a question on that, too. I just got out of the hospital, anyway!

THERAPIST: Oh, you did?

CLIENT: We don’t want to talk about it, but we will. (pause) Okay. Last time I saw you was a Wednesday.

THERAPIST: Yeah, two Wednesdays ago.

CLIENT: That Thursday, I want and saw Dr. Edward (therapist affirms)... That was okay. I got an injection in my coccyx area.

THERAPIST: Coccyx, yeah.

CLIENT: And it hurt like...

THERAPIST: It hurt like hell. Yeah, you had done that, and said that...

CLIENT: Hurt like hell, uh-huh.

THERAPIST: He told you it wasn’t going to be anything, and then, boy, was it... something!

CLIENT: Ahhhh! “I’ll use a little needle, it’s not going to hurt you!” [00:01:01]

THERAPIST: Yeah, right!

CLIENT: Bam! Boy, did I let out a scream! (therapist affirms) So the following day...

THERAPIST: I heard you from here!

CLIENT: Yes! I... got up, and slid right down to the floor.

THERAPIST: Oh, no!

CLIENT: Right up against... I just slammed right on my ass all the time.

THERAPIST: Oh, my God!

CLIENT: So... Deborah called 911, because she couldn’t get me up, and I couldn’t get up. So, the ambulance people came, the fire engines, you know, the whole works. (pause) They asked what was wrong, and Deborah said, “She fell out of bed.” Right? (inaudible) down. So, one of the... EMT guys said that they... my face looked like it was drooping, and that I looked like I was having a stroke. So, they wouldn’t take me to the Amherst Hospital; they took me to the hospital in Cheshire, where I went to the Emergency Room first. [00:02:13]

THERAPIST: Oh, no. What, did they try to get... what, IVs in?

CLIENT: IVs into me, which they couldn’t, but that, yet they kept sticking away, figuring they were going to get... So they figured, you know, they finally got it, until, you know, the blood was just squirting right back out. I was saying, you know, “It’s not working!” “Oh, but that’s fine.” So I took it out myself and said, “No, I think it’s bleeding!”

THERAPIST: (under breath) Oh, no...

CLIENT: “You know, that’s a no-no here in the hospital.” I said, “Well, guess what? If you had gotten it in in the first fucking place, I wouldn’t have taken it out!” I said, “I know what the hell I’m doing!” So...

THERAPIST: Yeah, you’ve probably applied (ph) more than they have.

CLIENT: Yeah. So, well, we’re going to have the IV nurse come in. The IV nurse came in and, you know, she’d go, “Well, let’s try another one.” She couldn’t get it. After five times, she still couldn’t get it. I says, “Is there anybody else? The janitor? You know, the housekeeper? Maybe they know what the hell they’re doing, because you people certainly don’t!” Next thing I know, I’m up in a room on the second floor! They admitted me! For a urinary tract infection, I had E coli in my bloodstream, and I had pneumonia. [00:03:50]

THERAPIST: You had pneumonia? Oh, my gosh!

CLIENT: So, I got admitted into...

THERAPIST: This was what, this was the day... Wow! When was this?

CLIENT: The Friday.

THERAPIST: Just two days after we met last. (client affirms) Oh, my God.

CLIENT: So, I’m in a private room and, of course, one of the nurses down in the Emergency Room recognized me. Then I get up to the second floor, and the secretary up there recognized me, because I trained her to be a secretary.

THERAPIST: Oh, is that right? Huh!

CLIENT: And the Pediatric Department now it’s all separate, private rooms; so that’s where they had me.

THERAPIST: In the Pediatric?

CLIENT: Yeah, there are no more Pedi (ph), though. So what they did was they made all of those rooms private ones. (therapist affirms) Well, this floor, the second floor is humongous. They took out all the offices on the other side, and they made all rooms out of there. So, I don’t know how many rooms, but there are quite a few. There is this one fucking doctor, 47 years old, he is. He has every patient on that fucking second floor. He comes in the room... [00:05:16]

THERAPIST: He’s in charge of it.

CLIENT: Every single patient.

THERAPIST: Oh, my God!

CLIENT: Right? Well, he comes in my room, he says, “It’s not Mr. and it’s not Dr. I like to be called Ivan (later corrected as Evan).” I says, “Yeah? It’s not Mrs., it’s not Miss, it’s not Miss Sawyer (ph), it’s not Ashley, it’s Louise. Got that, Dr. Evan?” “I told you, I won’t answer to that name.”

THERAPIST: He said that?

CLIENT: Yeah. I said, “Good.”

THERAPIST: He just wants to be called “Evan”?

CLIENT: Yeah. I said, “Good, we won’t have any conversations, will we?”

THERAPIST: (pause) What... what the heck was that about?

CLIENT: I...

THERAPIST: What a guy! Well, he’s... he must...

CLIENT: Oh (chuckles), you don’t know how many times I clashed with him the whole time I was there! I went up to the front desk and he’s standing there. I says,

“You discharging me now?” [00:06:17]

“No.”

I said, “What do you mean, no?” I says, “That, since I’m not having a stroke,” I says, “I want to go home!” I said, “I want to go to my own hospital, Amherst Hospital.” I said, “I’ll call up the ambulance and have them come and get me, and switch over to, Amherst Hospital.”

“No, I’m not discharging you!”

I says, “You don’t have to discharge me!” I says, “I don’t have to be here if I don’t want to be here!”

“You’re too sick!”

(pause) This is his fucking excuse. I was lucky if I saw a nurse. The only time a nurse came in was to change the IV bag, and to change the antibiotic, and to give me a shot of Heparin (which my whole stomach is so black and blue and purple, it’s unreal).

THERAPIST: From the shot?

CLIENT: Yeah. You would think I only had one side of a stomach, because that’s all they stuck.

THERAPIST: Oh, boy!

CLIENT: (pause) Finally, it got to the point on... what was it? The following Tuesday... [00:07:26]

THERAPIST: What’s the Heparin for, again?

CLIENT: Because you’re not moving, and they don’t want clots to form...

THERAPIST: Oh, right, yeah. It’s an anti-coagulant.

CLIENT: ...so they give you the Heparin shot, yeah. So they said, “Are you sure you’re not on any blood thinners?” I says, “You have my fucking list of meds. No, I’m not on any blood thinners.” They decreased... some of my medication. If I was taking... 10 mg, they would give me 2.5 mg. So with this lovely UTI, I had no control of my bladder, so the moment I got up to head into the bathroom, I would pee the whole way.

THERAPIST: Oh, boy!

CLIENT: So then I’d have to get changed, and of course, the nurse’s aide, she just really loved that. I says, “Well, don’t look at me! This is, it’s your doctor’s God-damn fault. You know, Eeeeevan!” [00:08:26]

(pause) (whispering) They did not like me at all up there for some strange reason! They did bring me up my breakfast, and I refused to eat it. So the girl finally came up, she says, “What can I get you, Louise, because you have to eat.” I says, “All I want is a bowl of Cheerios every morning,” I says, “and a piece of, and a fresh fruit cup.” I says, “I don’t see how they can go wrong with that. I don’t want tea, I don’t want coffee. Give me apple juice, give me orange juice. That’s that.” So they did that.

Then finally, she got it correct on lunch. I had chicken salad sandwich, fresh fruit cup, diet Pepsi, and diet ginger ale, diet Coke. Same thing, I had it for lunch and for supper, the whole four days I was there. It’s the only thing that...

THERAPIST: You were there four days? (client affirms) Oh, my gosh!

CLIENT: Yeah, until I finally called Dr. Winchester.

THERAPIST: And you were, this was just to recover from the pneumonia?

CLIENT: Yeah, and the UTI, and the E coli in the blood system. [00:09:31]

THERAPIST: Oh, my gosh!

CLIENT: So, I finally called Dr. Winchester’s office. I explained everything to his nurse, Daneen (sp), and she Dr. Winchester call up Dr. Evan and I was discharged immediately! (pause) Good boy, Dr. Benny!

THERAPIST: Benny boy came through?

CLIENT: Yes! Dr. Evan was in the room and he says, “Looks like you’ll be leaving us, because I just heard from a Dr. Winchester, and he wants you discharged.”

THERAPIST: What’s this?

CLIENT: That’s from the good old hospital. (sound of paper rustling)

THERAPIST: Carlos Ivan? (client affirms) (corrects) Evan. Huh!

CLIENT: Look him up on... on Google.

THERAPIST: What’s his nationality? Do you know?

CLIENT: I think he’s Spanish. (therapist affirms) He didn’t sound Dominican to me. (pause) Forty-seven years old and he thinks he’s...

THERAPIST: Oh, you looked him up on Google?

CLIENT: Yep. He thinks he’s the prophet.

(sound of flipping pages)

(pause 00:10:44 to 00:11:56)

THERAPIST: Look at all of that...

CLIENT: I mean, he’s holding my meds, you name it.

(sound of flipping pages)

(pause 00:12:10 to 00:12:24)

THERAPIST: (under breath) Oh, (inaudible) the rest of the meds. (pause) (sound of flipping pages) Oh, okay. What, were you wanting to give me a copy of this?

CLIENT: Uh, I don’t have a copy, but I’ll make one.

THERAPIST: No, no, that’s okay.

CLIENT: I’ll mail it to you.

THERAPIST: I didn’t know if that’s what you were wanting to do.

CLIENT: Because I... I have quite a few. I have to give Dr. Winchester that, and they had a...

THERAPIST: You don’t have to give me a copy. That’s fine.

CLIENT: I can. So, I came home on a Tuesday. I had physical therapy on a Thursday, they come to the house. I’ve had physical therapy twice a week.

THERAPIST: What did they do for you? Strengthening stuff?

CLIENT: Well, I have, I’ll do this and do that, and then I have to go out and up, then I have to march, and then I have to go stand by the sink and march, and put my feet up, and up and down. Yeah. So, you know, the usual crap! [00:13:40]

THERAPIST: Yeah. Sounds like, to strengthen legs and calves, thighs...

CLIENT: Yeah. In the meantime, this is killing me. This, talk about killing? Yeah. Okay, and then to top it all off, they look pretty good now, but both my legs were so swollen, I couldn’t get a regular shoe on that tied. So I had to either wear this or my slippers.

THERAPIST: Oh, is that right?

CLIENT: Yeah. But this one is still swollen, here. But the whole leg, they looked like tree trunks.

THERAPIST: Oh, is that right?

CLIENT: Oh, yeah. They were all just...

THERAPIST: What was it from, do you...?

CLIENT: It was from... the... I was holding fluids.

THERAPIST: You were just retaining... uh-huh.

CLIENT: So, I went and saw... I had to go see... the nurse practitioner at the Falmouth Clinic. So, she had me come in on Friday, and she looked at all of my bruises and everything, so... And the nurse did... Oh, first the nurse saw them, then she told me I had to stay and wait for the nurse practitioner, because she wanted to see them, and how bad they were. I showed them, and they... I’m even bruised on my breast. Don’t ask me how they managed to screw my breast up! I don’t know! But I got bruises like this... And they weren’t from Artie (sp), because he wasn’t around. [00:15:12]

(pause) I said, “I don’t know what the fuck they did to me up there.” I says, “All I know, every time...” I slept a lot, believe me! (pause) It was just, it was... the most horrible experience I have ever had (therapist responds) in all my life. I got a phone call from someone from the hospital, asking me, you know, how my stay was and everything. I said, “I’m going to tell you something. I have a cat that’s dying right now,” I says, “and I wouldn’t even let her go up to your hospital and die!”

THERAPIST: Wow!

CLIENT: I said, “I have never had such a bad experience in all my life.” I says, “From now on, if that ever happens, and then once they have a diagnosis,” I says, “I will be out of that hospital and I will go to my home hospital.” I says, “I don’t care, that’s all there is to it.” [00:16:18]

THERAPIST: Boy, what a... How about that?

CLIENT: I said, I work in...

THERAPIST: You’ve been there before, right?

CLIENT: Oh, yeah!

THERAPIST: Yeah. It’s just really...

CLIENT: Long before this guy has ever... there is no... Like, we used to have a Pediatric Department. We used to have offices that were for... blood work like, for cancer and stuff like that. That’s gone. He’s got that all turned into rooms. (pause) We used to have an ICU unit. They don’t have that anymore. We used to have two Psych Wards; those are gone. The only thing that’s open there was Emergency Room, Prompt Care, the Lab and the X-Ray Department, and then that whole second floor that he has.

(pause) They’re just... So on the last day, don’t I get this male nurse. His name was Sirius. Well, Sirius looks like... he’s got the, all black underneath his eyes, the dark circles... He was white, blond hair, cute, but there was something definitely wrong from him. Either he was a drug addict or something. He was... [00:17:43]

THERAPIST: He was like, a full nurse, RN?

CLIENT: Yeah. He was on something good, yeah. That day that he had, the last day I was there, Tuesday, was his first day back to work in a while. So I don’t know. But he looked... like he didn’t know what the hell was going on. He’d be talking to me, and my food tray would come in. He’d say, “I’m hungry!” The next thing you know, he was gone out of the room! His cart was in my room, all locked up, but he was gone! He went to go eat somewhere! (pause) Oh, (chuckles) (whispers), he was gone! Gone, gone, gone, gone!

THERAPIST: You mean, he was...

CLIENT: He was as high as a kite!

THERAPIST: I mean, but he came in to do something and he...

CLIENT: Oh, yeah. He came in to give me my meds.

THERAPIST: Did he give them to you?

CLIENT: After he came back.

THERAPIST: Oh, after he came... he didn’t do it until... he had eaten? (client affirms) Oh, my gosh! What kind of place is this?

CLIENT: It was unreal. [00:18:45]

THERAPIST: Wow!

CLIENT: So I says, “Peter, am I going home today?” “No, I don’t think so.” So that’s when I got ahold of Dr. Winchester’s office. It was a Tuesday, because he’s only in on a freakin’ Tuesday, you know?

THERAPIST: Boy, that’s, yeah, it’s really... really says something, that kind of experience at a hospital.

CLIENT: Ohhh...

THERAPIST: Really, really not cared for very well.

CLIENT: I said never, ever again! You know? I don’t remember a nurse coming down and sitting in there with me, and talking with me at all...

THERAPIST: Is that right?

CLIENT: ...and going over my meds. Nothing!

THERAPIST: Wow!

CLIENT: Nothing! Not a thing!

THERAPIST: Just sit there, 40, 47 rooms, one of 47. One doctor (client affirms), a nurse that sees you, what? Once a...

CLIENT: Once every... so often, to give me another injection.

THERAPIST: That’s it?

CLIENT: That’s it. And to come in and hang up another bag of insul , no, antibiotics I was on and IV solution, because I was dehydrated, too. They were trying to get rid of the pneumonia, they were trying to get rid of the E coli that was in my bloodstream, and the UTI. So I had two different kinds of antibiotics going. I had three bags going all at once. (therapist affirms) [00:20:10]

(pause) You know, it was just like... Ohhh, God! “Do you want something for the pain?” I says, “Of course, I want something for the freakin’ pain!” Oh, they were just so unreal! “Why are you on Methadone and Percocet?” I says, “Because I like them, that’s why. What the hell you think I’m on them for?” I says, “Because I’m in constant pain! If you go through my records, you’ll find out.” He insists he was going to get me an MRI.

I says, “I can’t have MRIs.”

He said, “Why?”

I said, “Because I have a pacemaker, it’s a no-no!”

He says, “Well, how about a CAT scan?”

I says, “I can have a CAT scan, but I can’t have one with dye.”

“Why?”

“I only have the one kidney!”

(pause) So, of course, my one kidney wasn’t working properly. [00:21:11]

THERAPIST: Oh, really?

CLIENT: Yeah, so they had me down as “renal failure,” also. (pause) So...

THERAPIST: Oh, boy...

CLIENT: Friday, when I went to see... the... practical nurse there, or the, whatever they’re called, nurse practitioners at Winchester’s office, my kidney function was a little bit better than what it had been in the hospital. I went yesterday again to have more blood work, and I saw Dr. Winchester. I had more blood work, another urine specimen (inaudible). So I’m waiting today to hear how those came out.

Dr. Winchester was so concerned, he called me Sunday night, to see how everything was and everything. He says, “Well, I want to see you Tuesday.” I says, “Don’t worry. You’re down for Tuesday anyways.” He says, “Okay, I want you there early; 9:20!” I said, “Okay, fine.” And if anything is wrong... I’m going to have to get admitted and (inaudible), if my labs aren’t all right. [00:22:27]

THERAPIST: But you went in Law ... You went into...

CLIENT: I would never go back there.

THERAPIST: But you went in yesterday, to see him? (client affirms) Okay, and you haven’t heard the lab, you haven’t gotten the labs back. But you might have to get, you still might need to be admitted.

CLIENT: Yeah, yeah. He says if I still have the infection, I will go to Cambridge Hospital.

THERAPIST: Didn’t they, did they check on how, the status of the infection... at...?

CLIENT: They... no. They thought when I had fallen... According to Dr. Winchester, my one kidney has been fine. He says, “But when you fall, and you hit,” he says, “the secretions in the kidney... expand.” He says that’s due from the fall. So, he says, “That’s why your kidney... we got a bad result.” He says, “But after a few days of bed rest,” he says, “it should have been... you know, getting better,” you know? I said, “Okay.” [00:23:35]

So, meantime, I said to him, “You know, my coccyx area is still killing me.” So he looks at it, and then he has to call in the wound specialist (chuckles), who I know quite well. Of course, she comes in, “Oh, if there is anybody’s crack I like looking at, it’s Louise’s!” (therapist chuckles) “Can’t you agree with that, Dr. Winchester?”

THERAPIST: Oh, yeah. I bet you two are peas in a pod.

CLIENT: So that’s okay. I have no skin on my coccyx.

THERAPIST: What??

CLIENT: No skin. It’s all gone!

THERAPIST: Oh, my God!

CLIENT: So, I had to have a...

THERAPIST: Is that what she told you? You didn’t know that before?

CLIENT: Well, I knew something was wrong!

THERAPIST: But you didn’t know it was that? (client denies) Oh, my gosh!

CLIENT: She says, “I suppose Dr. Edward had a good time putting that needle in you, huh Linda?” She used to work for Dr. Edward; this is how I know her.

THERAPIST: Oh, okay.

CLIENT: And I said, “Oh, yeah, he told me it wasn’t going to hurt.” She says, “Yeah. Asshole!” I says, “You know, that’s what I said, too!” (chuckles) I says, “He kept telling me, ‘It’s not going to hurt!’ And then he kept saying, ‘I’m using a little needle.’ It’s a needle looks like this!” (chuckles) [00:24:45]

THERAPIST: Why was the skin off? Was it...?

CLIENT: It’s... it’s just not healing, since when I fractured it a year ago.

THERAPIST: It just still hasn’t healed, yeah.

CLIENT: And, of course, all of the falls I take. I don’t land on my knees or over on my stomach or on my side; I land straight on my ass. My two legs are out straight... it’s my ass that’s taking the impact.

THERAPIST: That, and when you hit your coccyx, that is terrible. It is really, really painful.

CLIENT: Yeah! So now I have this DuoDERM thing on it that’s supposed to be like another piece of skin. She’s got that on it. If it falls off, I have spare ones at home that I can put on it.

THERAPIST: And what do you do, just tape it on the back?

CLIENT: No, it just sticks. (therapist affirms) It’s like silly putty, almost.

THERAPIST: Oh, is that right?

CLIENT: Yeah. And it’s called DuoDERM.

THERAPIST: And it does stick pretty well? [00:25:45]

CLIENT: Oh yeah, yeah. So... we got that on.

THERAPIST: Hmm. Okay. Gosh!

CLIENT: Then I go back and see Dr. Winchester next week, if everything is fine this week. I still have to go back next week.

THERAPIST: You’ll go back on Tuesday, as usual?

CLIENT: So he can check me out. I says, “Yeah, I know. You want to really check me out!” (chuckles) Poor doctor Winchester! Uh-huh.

THERAPIST: (pause) Um, yeah, so... What’s with the UTIs? Did they tell you what it was from?

CLIENT: Yeah, I’ve had it since April! (pause) Since April!

THERAPIST: They don’t know what it’s from?

CLIENT: Nope, no. I mean, I’ve been with Mark, but you know, there is nothing there for me to have a UTI. [00:26:48]

THERAPIST: No, okay. Not from intercourse?

CLIENT: No. (pause) Can’t blame Mark for that one. But I don’t know. It’s like I said, I’ve had it since April! Dr. Winchester gave me medication, he gave it to me for two days. After two days, it... it was back! Then the next doctor gave it to me for three days, then the doctor after that gave it to me for seven days. I’ve been on antibiotics the whole time, and I still had a UTI! (pause) So... Now, I’m still back on the antibiotic. I think I have two more days, a few more days.

THERAPIST: To take it? (client affirms) But you’ve been taking it since April, on and off?

CLIENT: Since April! Almost the whole time!

THERAPIST: Almost the whole time?

CLIENT: Yeah! And, of course, the more you take antibiotics... the more you wind up having to take another antibiotic, so... And then, as I said, I had two different types hanging, one for the UTI and one for the E coli. I don’t know what the hell they were giving me for the pneumonia. They certainly weren’t giving me breathing treatments, even though I was wheezing like a son of a bitch. Oh, I had oxygen on. How easily we forget! Now that we’ve gotten a year older! (pause) So my lovely granddaughter will be here for the whole summer!

THERAPIST: She is coming for the whole summer. You had told me last time what had happened, that she had gotten admitted, right? To the hospital for overnight? [00:28:47]

CLIENT: Yeah. Peer pressure is what it was, from school. She’s now living with her other grandmother.

THERAPIST: Oh, she is!

CLIENT: Yup. She loves it. She has a queen-sized bed, her own room, you know, everything. Her Uncle Bobby drives her to school every day, her Uncle Bobby either picks her up, or her Grandpa Joe or Nana Margie picks her up from school. Today was her last day of school for the summer.

THERAPIST: Same school. (client affirms) Well, you know, what do you know...

CLIENT: She had finals. Well, she’s been, as I said, she’s been with the grandmother. Her phone was taken away from her, so she’s had no contact with any of her so-called friends. She did talk to my Riley and she told Riley that a lot of it was peer pressure, and the other kids, you know... saying, “Come on! Come on! Stop being a pussy! Come on, have a smoke! Have a smoke!” And she’s not a drinker. She doesn’t like booze, just like Deborah. Deborah doesn’t like booze either. But she did like her marijuana, and she, you know, did try a head of acid... [00:30:05]

THERAPIST: She did, huh?

CLIENT: ...which is, you know, Deborah has, Deborah’s done coke. You know, you name it.

THERAPIST: You name it, yeah.

CLIENT: So...

THERAPIST: That must scare you a little bit.

CLIENT: Yeah, yeah. (therapist sighs) So the two of them (noise like crinkling cellophane), that, you know, fun city. So Deborah’s totally been, they’ve been talking on the phone for about an hour at a time, which is very unusual for Deidre. She’s generally the “yes, no,” you know? (therapist affirms) But now she’s been, you know, talking to her mother quite a bit.

THERAPIST: How has that been for you to see?

CLIENT: It’s good for me, you know, I mean when I think it’s fine that they’re talking. Deborah says, you know... she’s going to straighten her out when she comes here. I says, “Well, no matter what, when she comes here...” Are you involved, can you take her on a tour of Cambridge? [00:31:14]

THERAPIST: Can I take her on a tour of Cambridge? Where, you mean... to the school? (client affirms) Well, they’ve got like, those tours in Cambridge in the square all the time.

CLIENT: Oh, really? Okay.

THERAPIST: I wouldn’t be able to get her in anyway.

CLIENT: All right. Because she wants to see Cambridge.

THERAPIST: Oh, she should go, she shouldn’t go to... They have like a, Visitor Information Center right in the center. (client affirms) Right in the center.

CLIENT: All right. And then, she wants to go to Lesley College, Harvard, and UMass.

THERAPIST: Yeah, they’ll all take you on tours.

CLIENT: (pause) Good, because that’s what she’ll go for. (pause) I guess her work, according to Riley, Riley and I talked yesterday for about an hour. (pause) Riley said, “Her work has kind of slipped,” she says, “but not as bad as she’s expected.” So, I says, “Well, that’s, she went from an A to a B?” And she says, “Yeah.” I says, “Well... we’ll take care of that.” But she’s in all advanced classes anyway. She’s all, she’s already all in college classes. [00:32:31]

THERAPIST: Taking Advanced Placement stuff, yeah.

CLIENT: So, I mean... you really can’t complain then, you know? The kid was like 16, doing advanced classes; 15, doing advanced classes; 14, doing advanced classes. She’s been doing advanced classes since she, you know, was like 13.

THERAPIST: Yeah, no, I mean it seems to me like it has less to do with, you know, the grades and more about her kind of, her change (client affirms), her change and maybe her loss of interest in school (client affirms) or if she’s been... you know, distracted or using, you know, pot too much (client affirms) or...

CLIENT: Yeah, and she’s always in her room by herself.

THERAPIST: Yeah, that’s the thing to address. The other stuff...

CLIENT: Heath works all night long, so he sleeps all day long. Then Riley works days, so she’s not home either. So, it made it easy for Darla to just drop, drift off into her room. (therapist affirms) You know, she’d make herself macaroni and cheese, and take the whole pan and bring it into her room to eat it, you know? [00:33:45]

THERAPIST: Yeah, and she... but, yeah, what you were describing to me, too, was this, I think last week, is that she’s been really withdrawn (client affirms), something is really happening for her emotionally (client affirms), she’s going through a real... change.

CLIENT: Riley says she wants her mother. This is what she wants: her mother. She wants to know why her mother left her, and all this stuff, you know? She did find out where Heath hides his stash of pot, so Heath must still smoke, and Riley doesn’t know it.

THERAPIST: (chuckles) Oh!

CLIENT: Because Riley’s not into that. So...

THERAPIST: Somebody who smokes marijuana knows where to find it, right?

CLIENT: Yep! She found it out in the garage, where daddy had it hidden.

THERAPIST: Yeah, there are no fools about that stuff. [00:34:43]

CLIENT: So, at Nana’s, Margie’s house, she has to come out and have meals in the kitchen. Papa Joe cooks her whatever she wants, Darla gets cooked for supper. If Papa Joe don’t cook it, Nana Margie cooks it, and since Nana Margie is home all the time... Darla has to, you know... she has 24-hour watch on her. (chuckles) Which is good! And she likes it! She wants to stay there. I guess she finally went and got all of the rest of her clothes from her father’s house, and she wants to stay at Nana Margie’s.

THERAPIST: Yeah, huh. Something about being at that house?

CLIENT: There is more discipline at Nana Margie’s house for her.

THERAPIST: Oh, yeah! Okay! Well, maybe she needs a little more TLC, you know? [00:35:45]

CLIENT: Oh, yeah. She gets that there, too. Oh, Papa Joe will get her anything she wants!

THERAPIST: Yeah, I mean, you know, I think, you know, the way you described Heath and Riley; you know, they’re busy, they have two kids who have a lot of their own needs. Of course, Darla is Heath’s kid and Riley is taking ownership in a lot of ways about that, but... I guess what I hear is, you know, she misses a mother. She misses an, you know, having somebody who puts her first, who really cares about her. You know like, you how you’re describing being one of 47 rooms. Well, you know just how it feels! (client affirms) I think Darla is speaking from that place, too. I don’t want to be, I want to be somebody’s special girl. (client affirms) She’s really hurting over it. (client affirms) I mean not to say that’s the whole story, but...

CLIENT: Well, it’s like what, they have the... Okay, there are four kids all together. [00:36:47]

THERAPIST: Oh, that’s right. There is a fourth kid.

CLIENT: Yeah, it’s Heath and Riley’s.

THERAPIST: Yes. Oh, then the two are Riley’s kids. That’s right, not Heath’s, yeah. Mindy and what is it...

CLIENT: Evelyn. So, it’s like, you know, okay fine. But... with Nana Margie and Papa Joe want to buy her her school pictures, she gets them, where if she’s at Riley’s, she can’t get them because they can’t afford to get all four school pictures of the kids. I says, “Well, you don’t, they don’t have to take the best package! They can take, you know, a small package and you know, do it that way.” (therapist affirms) You know? I mean, because that’s what Heath used to do to begin with, instead of sending me the good pictures, he would... (pause) not fax... Yeah, he’d fax me over a picture. Or, um... (inaudible) faxed copies... [00:37:50]

THERAPIST: Photo... scan it?

CLIENT: Scan. (therapist affirms) And that comes out sucky.

THERAPIST: No, that’s terrible.

CLIENT: Yeah, you know? So I said, you know, “You’re getting your senior school pictures done?” I says, “I will pay for the package, Darla.” I said, “I want the biggest package they have.” I said, “I want one of those, you know, size there, the 8x10s, 11x12s,” I says, “I want the small ones, the big ones, the wallet ones.” I said, “Key chains! Tee shirts! Coffee mugs!” (chuckles)

THERAPIST: You want it all!

CLIENT: I says, “Nana wants them all! And when Nana’s paying for it,” I says, “well, Nana will get them.” It’s as simple as that. I says, “And then I’ll send your father... a scanned (chuckles) picture!”

THERAPIST: (chuckles) Make a copy and send him a scanned picture!

CLIENT: Like he used to give me. [00:38:51]

THERAPIST: Oh, uh-huh! He was not the most generous of men!

CLIENT: No, no. But they’re paying for her plane tickets out!

THERAPIST: Oh! Well, good.

CLIENT: Because I talked to Riley last night and I said, “Deidre definitely wants to be here for July 4th, because she wants to go into Providence and see the fireworks.” I says, “In fact, she really wants to be here for the whole summer. So,” I says, “I know she gets out tomorrow,” which would, I talked to her last night. I said, “And I don’t’ know what day...” She probably goes back like, August 15th or something like that. I know it’s a few days after her birthday.

THERAPIST: Before Labor Day.

CLIENT: Oh, yeah, you know, so... I says, “Let me know.” I says, “She’s welcome to stay.” I says, “If she wants to stay here and go to school in September,” I says, “it’s fine for me. Just let me know.” I says, “We can get her records changed over.” You know? (pause) Oh. I’ll need a bigger apartment! [00:39:56]

THERAPIST: Oh, God! That’s right. I’d forgotten about that! Yeah, where the heck are you going, what are you going to do?

CLIENT: (whispers) I don’t know.

THERAPIST: (sighs) You could get a cot or something... a blow-up mattress. That’s a long time to spend on a blow-up mattress!

CLIENT: I had a blow-up mattress, but the cats decided to claw it, so that was out. I don’t know. Deborah’s on the couch, so Darla will sleep in the bed with me. So her and Deborah will swap. I will say, Darla don’t mind the couch, because she’s up all night, watching TV or she’s on her phone.

THERAPIST: (affirms) So, when, did they buy a ticket for a specific date yet?

CLIENT: No, not yet.

THERAPIST: But he’s going to pay.

CLIENT: Yeah. (singing) What a shock! Ha-da-da-da-da-da...

THERAPIST: Well, you know, you’re going to be providing, you know, room and board for two months. [00:40:57]

CLIENT: So Riley says, “Well you know, she eats a lot.” And I says, “Riley, I purposely went out and bought a freezer,” (therapist chuckles), I says, “that’s well-stocked for Darla. I said, “It has all of her frozen pizzas.” She likes those frozen hot peppers, jalapeno peppers and mozzarella sticks and this and that; in the freezer!

THERAPIST: You have it covered!

CLIENT: “Got it covered, Riley! Got her ice cream covered, got her juices covered, got her cookies covered.” Oh, she could eat a whole large pizza, all eight slices, all by herself! And so can Deborah...

THERAPIST: Oh, uh-huh. Well, the munchies, too, remember those, too.

CLIENT: Yup! (chuckles) As I eat one slice! (chuckles) If I’m lucky, I can get maybe another slice! (chuckles)

THERAPIST: Yeah. How do you feel about having her? [00:42:00]

CLIENT: I love the idea of it, yeah. No matter what, she’s still my baby. Deborah will go, “No, she’s mine!” I says, “You only gave birth to her, Deborah. I took care of her 24/7,” I says, “so don’t tell me.”

THERAPIST: Wow! How about that? A lot there, between you two, right?

CLIENT: Oh, yeah! I’ll straighten that right out.

THERAPIST: Oh, gosh. What does she say, when you say something like that?

CLIENT: “No, you didn’t!” I said, “Deborah, I had her from the moment, before you even went to work, I had her, and was giving her bottle and changing her, putting her back into bed, Deborah, so that she would sleep another four hours or what before you would get up.”

THERAPIST: How does she see it?

CLIENT: “I was up with her all the time!” I said, “Deborah, I don’t want to hear it! (therapist chuckles) I don’t want to hear it! You have that wrong!” (pause) So I think I might send my fucking son another letter. [00:43:10]

THERAPIST: Yeah? What would you say?

CLIENT: Tell him that his niece...

THERAPIST: ...is in town?

CLIENT: ...is in town, and I expect him to see her and take her out a few places. (pause) If not, may his d*ck fall off! May Moira’s crotch rot! I don’t know! (therapist chuckles) I don’t even know if they’re still fucking married!

THERAPIST: Yeah, yeah, I was thinking, yeah... I was going to ask if they’ve had kids, but they wouldn’t have had, yeah.

CLIENT: Oh, no! Oh, God, no!

THERAPIST: Yeah, Moira’s older, too, right?

CLIENT: Yeah, Moira’s close to being 50.

THERAPIST: Yeah, wow. And Heath is what, 40?

CLIENT: Forty-one, because Deborah turned 40. (therapist affirms) And, of course, I was 39. I don’t know how these kids get to be older than I am! [00:44:09]

THERAPIST: You were 39, what...?

CLIENT: (chuckles) Yesterday, on my birthday!

THERAPIST: Oh, you were 39 (chuckles), I see, I got it!

CLIENT: Deborah was 40 and I was 39.

THERAPIST: I get it. I thought you meant, when you...

CLIENT: Get it correct, will you? Jesus!

THERAPIST: Thirty-nine, that’s right. And your birthday was just, what...

CLIENT: Monday!

THERAPIST: Monday, oh wow! Okay!

CLIENT: I had a whipped cream cake with fresh strawberries in it, and Deborah had a nice, big half a sheet cake, ice cream cake. Then, someone gave us six cupcakes, no twelve cupcakes, with Happy Birthday on them. Okay! Diabetes heaven, here I come! (therapist affirms) I said, “Well, the whipped cream cake has fresh fruit in it!”

THERAPIST: Well, that’s the other thing about, I was thinking about the renal failure. How have the blood sugar numbers have been? [00:45:10]

CLIENT: Uh, they’ve been, you know, okay, except I haven’t taken them since I’ve been home. But in the hospital, they were fine.

THERAPIST: Was it hard to get the blood?

CLIENT: Well, I still have the marks in my fingertips from all the blood draws. Four times a day, on my fingers. I said, “I have fingers over here!”

THERAPIST: Aren’t they working on something to make it... they can get a blood sugar reading without drawing blood?

CLIENT: Yeah. Not them up there! She’d stick me, and she couldn’t get any blood, so she...

THERAPIST: You still check it, through doing like, the...

CLIENT: Yeah, so I mean, I have to soak my hands in warm water. I use a hot pack. Well, poor kid up at the clinic on Friday, when he saw all of these bruises and why I had them, and he couldn’t find a vein. They just can’t find them on me anymore. I’m getting like Mary. So he’s (inaudible) me, tapping, and he goes, “I can’t find any.” [00:46:24]

I says, “Why don’t you try the feet?”

“Well, God no! I’m not going in the feet!”

I says, “Well maybe you might get a vein there.”

“I’m not trying it, Louise.”

I says, “Well, the neck?”

“Oh, God, no! I’m not doing that either!” He says, “Wait a minute.” He kept going and going. “I found one!” (chuckles) He got the... I felt so bad for him!

And then the poor bastard! She decided after that blood was drawn that she wanted to do more blood work, but it had to be a separate draw. So he had to stick me again, and he had to find (chuckles) another place! Then yesterday, when I went, I had to have blood done again! I said, “I don’t know how come these young kids, that are working in the clinic up here, can get the blood work, but yet these old bags up at the freakin’ hospital who, “Oh, I’m the IV nurse...” [00:47:25]

THERAPIST: Couldn’t do it!

CLIENT: Couldn’t do a damn freakin’ thing, you know? I said, “No, no way.” So the day that I, that Tuesday, the kid Sirius, who’s in with like a French doc, I said, “I don’t want it.” He says, “What do you mean you don’t want it?” I said, “I told you! I don’t want the Heparin shot! Simple as that!” So, the girl comes in to do the finger stick, I says “No, we’re not doing any finger sticks today either. See you later; bye!”

THERAPIST: (pause) You get bruised all the time, yeah, the cost benefit kind of...

CLIENT: Darling cousin Mary has got into Cheshire housing.

THERAPIST: (surprised) She did? Holy cow!

CLIENT: She moves in this weekend.

THERAPIST: How did she even manage that?

CLIENT: I don’t know how she landed it.

THERAPIST: How the heck... [00:48:20]

CLIENT: But she’s in the main building, up at 121 Riverside Ave, which is like 20 stories high. Well, she’s got an apartment on the 7th floor. She doesn’t like it already. “It’s not as big as a kitchen as yours!” (therapist chuckles) “And the bathroom is not as big as yours, either.” I said, “Mary, it’s altogether different building. This is a round building,” I said.

“And I don’t like the view!” I says, “Well, would you like the view I have?” I said, “I have the fucking railroad tracks, and the train going by all the time.” I says, “And sometimes, it feels like you’re in one of those vibrating beds for a quarter,” because the train (inaudible) and sometimes they’ll send the trains with the freight stuff on them. I says, “And those rattle by at 2:00 in the morning.”

THERAPIST: Well, it’s quite a change from her previous life in that nice, fancy condo she had. [00:49:21]

CLIENT: So then she found out, her rent is $600, $600 and something a month. (whining) “Well, I thought it was bad living at Emma’s house with $300. I almost had a fit when she went to $350! But now they want...” I says, “Well, hey Mary, you have $2000 a month from your Social Security check.”

THERAPIST: Yeah, they do it based on, yeah.

CLIENT: A third of your rent, (corrects) your check. I says so, you know, hey... So time for me to leave, dear Horatio?

THERAPIST: Horatio! (chuckles) Is it Horatio now?

CLIENT: (chuckles) (inaudible) this plant.

THERAPIST: Yeah, plants, that’s right. I go by plant, Ivan.

END TRANSCRIPT