TRANSCRIPT OF AUDIO FILE:
BEGIN TRANSCRIPT:
THERAPIST: All right, (inaudible).
CLIENT: I don't (inaudible). So yeah, I did not know about (inaudible). Yeah. I don't know at all.
(pause from [00:00:56] to [00:01:15]).
THERAPIST: I mean it's up to you, we don't have to talk about it now, but whatever.
CLIENT: Yeah. (pause from [00:01:26] to [00:20:56])
I don't know what to say. (pause from [00:20:58] to [00:21:19]).
THERAPIST: I can see that. (pause from [00:21:20] to [00:21:27])
CLIENT: I'm trying. (pause from [00:21:28] to [00:23:34])
THERAPIST: How was your weekend?
CLIENT: It was okay. I only shopped, did ECT. It was really sad, all weekend. I did ECT, it was just really sad. (pause)
THERAPIST: What were you thinking about?
CLIENT: I have a lot of despair. I didn't see any, anything turning out well. (pause from [00:24:48] to [00:25:23])
THERAPIST: What did you see?
CLIENT: Well, I had you, I know I had ECT, which sounds like it's something interesting, really wasn't. Just (inaudible from [00:26:08] to [00:26:15])
THERAPIST: I'm confused, are you done with ECT now?
CLIENT: No, I'm still doing it. It's, I think they are in like a taper. So I think that we do it less often, but I'm still doing it.
(pause from [00:26:46] to [00:27:00]) I am, they upped the dosage the last time.
THERAPIST: Over the weekend?
CLIENT: Yeah.
THERAPIST: You are pretty hopeless huh?
CLIENT: Yeah.
THERAPIST: I mean, let's be clear, I mean you are feeling pretty hopeless.
CLIENT: Yeah. (pause)
THERAPIST: And don't see any way out of this.
CLIENT: Yeah. (pause) I guess I should, I just don't know what. (pause from [00:28:07] to [00:28:45]) They raised the dosage and I'm like that. That could have been...
THERAPIST: How often do you go?
CLIENT: Two or three times a week. I think it's at twice a week right now basically. (pause from [00:29:26] to [00:29:53]) It's okay.
(pause from [00:29:54] to [00:30:13]).
THERAPIST: Do you think you don't know what to say here because you've given up?
CLIENT: I don't know whether I've given up. (pause) It's certainly a possibility. (pause [00:30:41] to [00:30:57]).
THERAPIST: I hope not, but it seemed to be a possibility.
(pause from [00:31:01] to [00:31:20]). It does seem to me you don't really see a way out.
CLIENT: Yeah, yeah. (pause from [00:31:28] to [00:33:52]).
THERAPIST: Are you feeling a little shut down?
CLIENT: A bit. I'm tired.
THERAPIST: How do you feel? Did you not sleep much or?
CLIENT: No, I slept.
THERAPIST: Is this earlier than you usually get up?
CLIENT: Maybe, I don't know.
THERAPIST: Maybe you just aren't up.
CLIENT: (inaudible) (pause from [00:34:44] to [00:36:18])
THERAPIST: Maybe you're just sad?
CLIENT: Maybe I'm sad. I don't know what I am.
(pause from [00:36:34] to [00:38:40]).
THERAPIST: How suicidal have you been?
CLIENT: Not very bad. (pause) I hate that. But yeah.
THERAPIST: What do you mean?
CLIENT: I just, do not like the, I don't know, the way I kind of latch on to despair. I just really don't like it.
THERAPIST: I'm not saying it is this, I'm wondering if to you it feels sort of like a cop out or a self-indulgence or something? To latch on to despair.
CLIENT: It yeah, yeah. (pause from [00:40:10] to [00:40:59]).
THERAPIST: Have you become close in the last few weeks?
CLIENT: No, not really. It's kind of staying away.
(pause from [00:41:14] to [00:41:34]).
THERAPIST: I don't know if this is the right way to put it, but things feel a little bit quieter.
CLIENT: I feel quieter. (pause from [00:41:46] to [00:42:31]).
THERAPIST: Well, we should stop. And then we'll meet tomorrow at noon.
CLIENT: Okay.
THERAPIST: Call me if anything changes.
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