TRANSCRIPT OF AUDIO FILE:
BEGIN TRANSCRIPT:
CLIENT: I forgot that we are switching to new, sorry about that. But I came back.
THERAPIST: Okay, good. So you mean you came here at ten?
CLIENT: Yes.
THERAPIST: Oh, okay, sorry for the inconvenience.
CLIENT: Yeah, so. (pause from [00:00:32] to [00:01:03]) I don't know, I (pause) I cut my leg.
THERAPIST: Why did you do that? (pause from [00:01:26] to [00:02:35]).
CLIENT: James is taking a couple's counselling. (laughter)
THERAPIST: Yeah, I sort of heard that. She left me a message
CLIENT: (laughter) Oh really.
THERAPIST: (inaudible) part of him. Yeah. He's going to see her individually.
CLIENT: I guess that's good. I think that's good. I think it's funny.
THERAPIST: How so?
CLIENT: Well, it's just (pause) I don't know. This is how it works out. (pause from [00:03:39] to [00:04:32]).
THERAPIST: I had the impression you have mixed feelings about it.
CLIENT: I don't know, I don't think so.
THERAPIST: Good. (pause from [00:05:00] to [00:10:15]).
CLIENT: My friend Candace is coming. Tomorrow I think. That's good. She's one of my favorite people.
THERAPIST: How long will she be in town?
CLIENT: You know, I don't remember. I think James kind of arranged it for a few days.
THERAPIST: (inaudible)
CLIENT: Yeah, yeah. I think it was a, I was not doing so well sort of thing. So, he (inaudible). (pause from [00:11:32 to 00:11:51]). I wish I would remember.
THERAPIST: You wish you would remember?
CLIENT: I wish I would remember how long she was going to be in town. (pause) But I can't. (pause from [00:12:27] to [00:16:14]).
THERAPIST: Do you know why you're not sure what to say?
CLIENT: No.
THERAPIST: Is it not much is occurring to you or something?
CLIENT: I don't know. (pause)
THERAPIST: What's your feeling is the reason?
CLIENT: A little anxious. (pause)
THERAPIST: In a way that reminds you of anything?
CLIENT: Not really. (pause)
THERAPIST: You just draw a blank? (pause from [00:18:05] to [00:24:10]). I have a theory.
CLIENT: Okay.
THERAPIST: It's really more of a hypothesis, maybe you're not really here.
CLIENT: How so?
THERAPIST: Well, I think it's that nothing is really crossing your mind to say, or so much an answer to the things that I have that you are forgetting. Which I know, some of it could be related to the ECT, I wouldn't even know how much. But I'm sort of thinking that there's some way the cumulative effect might be that you are not being here. And then, I thought well maybe because that's because you don't want to be. I don't mean that to sound like on some level you sound like you have to work, you haven't said anyway that you have to work especially hard to get yourself here. So it's clearly not at that level. Yeah, I'm not sure why. I mean maybe it's because if we talk about things, we're likely to talk about things that are painful, maybe even in a painful way, and you don't want that. (pause)
CLIENT: (inaudible 00:26:17) I don't know. (pause from [00:26:21] to [00:27:26]). (inaudible) (pause from [00:27:28] to [00:29:39]).
THERAPIST: Have you been quiet like this elsewhere. Like (inaudible) to group or to James?
CLIENT: I feel like I am, yeah, talking less to James. I'm not sure, whether James has noticed. (pause) I feel like I need (inaudible).
THERAPIST: Are you clear how stark the difference is here? From how things were before? It's not clear?
CLIENT: Not really. No.
THERAPIST: Yeah, like except for just recently, I mean it's been hard for you, but it's quiet for more than about 30 seconds or a minute, you'd get quite anxious and have to fill the silence.
CLIENT: Okay.
THERAPIST: Or feel like you were doing something wrong.
CLIENT: Okay. That is different I guess. I don't know.
THERAPIST: It's okay.
CLIENT: (chuckles) I know.
THERAPIST: But I guess I am struck that it seems that you don't seem like to recall that. If you don't, you don't.
(pause from [00:32:06] to [00:32:29]).It that because you have a sense of having things really quiet, or it's hard to remember things we've talked about, or sessions have been like?
CLIENT: It's hard to remember what sessions have been like. I just don't have much of a sense of it. (pause from [00:32:53] to [00:33:40]).
THERAPIST: Like much at all, or over the last couple of months?
CLIENT: Not much at all. (pause from [00:33:47] to [00:34:06]). I'm okay with that.
THERAPIST: Is that, is it similar in other parts of your life? In other words, remembering like, what things had been like at home, what was it like before you moved, or where you used to live, or before James moved here, or do you remember those things more clearly?
CLIENT: I feel like I do, but I'm not sure. (pause)
THERAPIST: What about going to the coffee shop?
CLIENT: Yeah I remember that. (chuckles)
THERAPIST: You know of all the things you could have forgotten (chuckles).
CLIENT: Yeah, I know. (chuckles) (pause)
THERAPIST: It seems like you're, it's harder to remember what it's been like here.
CLIENT: Yeah, I think so.
THERAPIST: There are all sorts of facetious things I could say. (pause from [00:35:33] to [00:36:00]). And that feels okay?
CLIENT: Yeah.
THERAPIST: It feels like stuff you don't so much need to remember?
CLIENT: Yeah. (pause from [00:36:10] to [00:37:32]).
THERAPIST: Do you feel at all disoriented here?
CLIENT: I don't think so. (pause from [00:37:43] to [00:42:52]).
THERAPIST: We have to stop in a few minutes. I just want to try to go about safety stuff.
CLIENT: Yeah, I think I'm okay.
THERAPIST: Candace's coming?
CLIENT: Wednesday. (pause) I think I'll be okay.
THERAPIST: How were you feeling yesterday and this morning?
CLIENT: Not so good.
THERAPIST: What was going on?
CLIENT: (pause) I don't know. (pause)
THERAPIST: You know you felt bad?
CLIENT: Yeah, I (pause) Yeah I just felt really bad. (pause from [00:44:35] to [00:44:57]).
THERAPIST: It's hard to remember?
CLIENT: Yeah.
THERAPIST: Do you think it's harder to remember here or, like if you were at home and James said what went on yesterday, would it be easier?
CLIENT: I think it's possible.
THERAPIST: Let's do an experiment.
CLIENT: Okay (chuckles)
THERAPIST: I'm curious what's going on. It's not necessarily bad. I mean, it's bad that you feel bad, that you feel bad. But, I mean, for some reason the ECT is having we can kind of chalk some of it up to that. But not remembering things here, in a way that's pretty striking and also different, leaves me, I mean I think the changes with ECT are probably more global than that, you know? So, kind of makes (inaudible).
CLIENT: Okay.
THERAPIST: Again, I'm not saying that it's permanent or bad. I just wondered what's up. Do you have (inaudible [00:46:45]) questions about it?
CLIENT: Not really.
THERAPIST: Does it make you worried?
CLIENT: A little bit. (pause from [00:46:55] to [00:47:15]).
THERAPIST: Let me ask James if you can remember more clearly talking to James than in here. And we'll talk more tomorrow.
CLIENT: Okay.
THERAPIST: You have clinic time for tomorrow?
CLIENT: What time do I come tomorrow?
THERAPIST: 12:55.
CLIENT: 12:55, okay, thank you.
THERAPIST: Which is a different time than we just,
CLIENT: That's what I had but I didn't know if that's right or not.
THERAPIST: Yeah, that's right. Yeah.
END TRANSCRIPT
